I’m taking a class with the Rolfing Guru Emmett on Kauai ahead of my wedding. The emerging theme of the class and this week has been living in the present. I’m seeing that the job of a bodyworker and a partner is to understand the other in yourself, then to accept and love that other.
The goal is to live without fear from the past and anxiety about an unknown future. What we are left with is the present. The more gossamer thin the present is, the razors edge so to speak the more interesting it is.
This years Massage Tips for Lovebirds is a bit more subtle, more nuanced than in the past. It starts with being present. Maybe the greatest gift we can give to our partners is the gift of our time. Being fully present in a moment together.
A massage, or personal contact is a wonderful way to do that. This is a gift to your partner. You are giving them a massage but you are also giving of yourself. Your practice will be to stay present in each moment (if your mind gets busy simply find your breath and follow in in and out)
The following two secrets are the most conceptually sophisticated I’ve ever shared. You’ll find no technique here, just ways of opening doors to connection and understanding.
Embodiment – Imagine what it’s like to live in that body and love them for whats there. We have a physical body and something I like to think of like a hologram projected onto and inside it. See if you can borrow the hologram for a little while, try it on and take if for a walk.
We all want to be known. Being understood and accepted can be a powerful way to re-establish a connection on a deep level.
The Magic Eraser – As a professional bodyworker our job is to create a body with a feeling of now. No fear from past events or traumas and no expectations about what is to come living in the tissue. When working on your loved one, be the eraser of the past. Feel what is living in the tissue and use your hands to erase it a magic erasers.
The Healing Machine sometimes needs a little oil. Your hands have he power to cleanse and renew. They can wipe away pain and stress just as surely as they can clean the kitchen.